Separation Anxiety

Here's what I'm listening to as I write this post and it feels kinda fitting.

"You were the love of my life, the darkness, the light.
This is a portrait of a tortured you and I.
Is this the, is this the, is this the end?
I'll wrap my hands around your neck so tight with love, love, love."

Life is one ironic piece of shit.
One day you lament yourself or talk about something like breaking teeth, the next day you actually break it.
One day you post a quote;

With a gif saying something like 'no motivation' [for that inspirational quote] and the gif vanishes, leaving you just with the said inspirational quote, making others perceive you're extra motivated.
Only no.

Missing the first 5 seasons of SPN, tho.

The irony I bring you today is; when you're a kid with divorced parents and have absolutely no troubles with them finding someone else to love, you end up with a [kid] family member that controls you to that extent. 

So today's theme post is: kids with separation anxiety. For starters anyway.

Personally, I've never been a fan of going out much. All my friendships are internet based.
U.S.A., Canada, The Netherlands, Japan even China - you name it. I've had friends all over the world thanking that great MSN era. Hell - I've met the best thing of my life online and weren't it for him, I wouldn't be sitting here writing to you.
I used to be on computer literally 24/7, including failing field trips at school just to be connected.
Talk about addiction. Luckily, that all spiraled down and faded to near nothing when I moved to Angola and my internet was limited: couldn't go to youtube (hence my complete abomination for youtubities, since it became THE THING), tumblr, etc you name it. I couldn't go.
So my brain was fed pretty much by playing with my dogs, roleplaying and watching television and wasn't until late last year that my brain woke up from that constant dormant state.
I realized everything I was, was gone. People keep changing and sometimes it's not for the better.

It's the beauty of society. Guessing that's why I love to see people interacting with each other.
People who are fake and you smell them at a distance, people who get right under your nose and you can only smell fake when they stab you in the back.
People who only show their true controlling nature when you start doing something they don't like.
Let me tell you - people are free. When I mean free is, free will to do whatever they please.
Good or bad choices, it's their brain. Some people can't learn anything with others. Some people can't simply grow the fuck up.

When I was 16, I was living alone with my abusive grandparents, which was one of the reasons that led me to try to suicide.
For those wondering, no. I'm perfectly okay talking about it and no, it's not for attention seeking.
More now than ever, I see kids either committing suicide because of bullies, or falling in depression for oblivious reasons such as "my sister got a new friend".
One day someone I admire said "you can be with someone and still feel lonely."
How do you fight that?
Depression is fashion. I said it and will say it again. Thanks to children like Billie Eilish, songs like "Sucker for Pain" or even literature like "50 Shades of Grey", open a wide margin in a child's mind. Wide enough to let a predator, someone feeding false information or simple mind games to dictate how this child grows up.
To dictate how society builds up.

"So drink our blood like a parasite,

For occupation, socialite,

Just looking for another hit,

Opinion's what you say it is - it's tragic."

This sums it up pretty well.

Which also leads to another subject: Adults who spoil their kids too much.
I mean sure. We all want to provide them with everything they want because we don't like to see them crying. Hell, if I see a man crying, I'm bawling my eyes out right in that second.

omfg what have i done now i'm crying

But that's emotional blackmail.
We all do that as kids. I used to do it. And was a single child. My parents provided me with the world and back. And still I tried to betray them by trying to send me off from this world.
No one's ever happy. EVER.

The Grinch.

This movie is so accurate it hurts. Guessing y'all reading this can understand what I mean.
Kids value materials more than connections. The connections they value are based on abuse.
Abuse makes them depressed and materialistic. It's an ouroboros.

And it's not until your sixth sense warns that you are losing your friends - people who fucking get who you are, especially hard when you're a glitch of society - that you feel you need to sit down with your thoughts and just let it go all away. Your worries. Stop caring about whether they're happy or not.

Sometimes I wanna punch you in the gut but,

Family or not. Family doesn't come from blood - thank you Supernatural again.
No one replaces anyone. You learn some people just complement your life just by the fact that they're breathing.
Quoting myself from a previous post: "It's like we're a big ice cream and those cool people take a spoonful and elevate us. Spiritually." Still relevant.
Sounds odd? Well, I guess I'm content with the fact that they exist and I'm actually living to see them.
Thanks, Bunny.

So to all the parents out there - please absolutely don't spoil your kids like this.
Tell them no and make them do stuff they don't like, in order to grow up.

Children always need a firm grip. Whether it's kids or simply adults acting like children.

- Sometimes you're actually right.
From: Pop Kids

Here's the song that's making my blood boil right now and I can't understand why:

Also blaming myself for not paying the right attention to You Me At Six when my former best friend went all crazy about them, back in '07.

Hope you get fresh start fevers as well, my moon children.